Got Resurrection?

Last night it happened again. I woke up at dark O'clock and could not get back to sleep ... did my usual meditative things, breathing "Jesus" [inhale on "je", exhale on "sussssssss"], mentally singing Taize choruses ["Nothing can trouble, nothing can frighten ..." or "O God hear my prayer, O God hear my prayer, when I call, answer me ..."] but nothing helped this time.

Too many worries --did Angel make it thru the night at the vet's? [Yes she did] Will I be able to afford the vet bill? Will DH find a job somewhere in mid-Michigan? What if she doesn't? Should I ask for a raise on my salary? Should I look for a little part time work to supplement my income ... Question piled upon question, worry upon worry, soooooo ... I gave up and got out of bed at 7:00 am [that is early for me, since I don't usually get to bed until after midnight] made coffee and sat before the TV, oddly and unusually comforted by the banality of the mainstream media, instead of being infuriated by all the stories they're not telling.

I love this painting ... Matthias Grunewald, the Easter vision of the Isenheim altar [It's Good Friday companion piece is equally moving ...] and I have been craving its message today. Very simply, in the midst of death, there is life; in the place of shadow there is light; and redemption prevails despite pain and sin. "Even if he slay me, I will trust in God" Job says --and Grunewald understands why.

Now if only I could remember that at dark O' clock ...